Is Pavlov the boss?

What kind of screen are you reading this on? If the Google Analytics stats are correct, at least 8 out of 10 of you are reading on a cell phone. (Also, if Google Analytics is accurate the average time spent reading the blog per visit is about 1 minute and 22 seconds. Either you all are really fast readers or you're not spending much time here! I'm going to swallow my pride and keep writing.) Before you keep reading, scroll down to the bottom and type a comment with what device you are reading this on (smartphone, computer, tablet, etc.).

I read this blog by Seth Godin yesterday. I'd encourage you to read it as well. I'll wait here while you do. It will take about 1 minute and 22 seconds to read it. In case you didn't read it, I'll summarize. Basically we are addicted to our phones, like a fix, a hit, a high. We are being controlled by these little devices in our pocket. Like Pavlov's dogs, we hear a bell and we respond. Don't we? I usually do.

I got a smartwatch no long ago, and I'm not sure if it's better or worse now. I get notifications right on my wrist. I might look at my phone a little less frequently if we are counting the number of views, but I doubt I look at it less if we're measuring time. My wife likes to remind me about that.

If you read our jointly written blog yesterday, you will remember that one of the topics was spending time together. But, we didn't talk about the quality of the time spent together. If my nose is buried in the phone checking Facebook or Instagram or Google Now or Twitter or... or... or... my actions are belying my words. I may say that time together is important, but I need to make sure I turn the phone off, or get it away from me, or whatever.

Now I know some of you out there will say, "Well, I don't have a Facebook account" or "I don't have the Facebook app on my phone." Well, what do you have? You might have Pinterest. You might have the ESPN app. You might have Netflix, or YouTube, or... or... or... Most of us are guilty of this to some extent. That's one reason you see folks saying they are going on a social media "fast" or that they're "taking a break from Facebook" for a while.

I'm so guilty of this that I put a note on my phone to remind me not to let it consume me. You know how you can put apps together in a folder on your phone? Well, I have one for social media apps. I long ago changed the name of the folder to "Don't Waste Your Life." See...

I'm not sure why we're addicted. We use it to keep up with other people, usually so we can compare lives to those of others. That's not a winning proposition. We use it to keep up with news. Isn't it a lot of fun reading about politics and protests and celebrities? We use it to kill time, hours of our lives at a time. We do use it for good as well, to encourage others, to keep up with family and friends for the right reasons, to let others share in our blessings. Let's do more of that.

I don't really have much advice here, because frankly I'm not in any position to give it. The blog post I referenced earlier about Pavlov reminded me that I need to spend time on things that matter (like writing for you!). I purpose to spend more real time with my kids and my wife, to look at people when they're talking to me, to leave the phone in another room sometimes. And I also am determined to call people more to talk. There are so many friends of mine from years ago that I need to talk to, and not via Facebook Messenger or SMS. I'm going to call them. So if you're a friend and you haven't talked to me in a while, send me your number 

For everyone else reading, here's my only advice. Don't waste your life.

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It. Was. Lightning.

The Bible study with the kids tonight was about worry.  It referenced the passage of scripture in Matthew 6 about worrying doing you no good.  Reilly didn't make it all the way through, but he did do a great job singing the first 10 books of the Bible and reciting a couple of his memory verses.

After we were finished with the reading portion, my wife asked T.J. (he's 6) if he worries.  Of course we as parents know everything about him, so we know that he gets scared and worries about certain things.  So after her question, he answers, "No."  "You're kidding, right?" says his mom.  "Well, not really," he says.  My wife points out, "You do too worry about things.  You were scared the other night about the storm."  

His reply...

It. Was. Lightning.

Well, he has a point, doesn't he?  Lightning is cause for concern.  You don't think lighting is reason to worry?  Okay, I don't either, but check this out.  Scary stuff for sure.

In any event, I kind of chuckled, first that he had said he doesn't worry, and second because it was funny how he said "It. Was. Lightning." as if it was stupid to even suggest that one would not worry about lightning.

(Tangent: I can hear Reilly [he's 3] say right now, "You just typed a bad word, Daddy."  My wife always gets in trouble by Reilly for saying stupid.)

Then I realized, we as adults do the exact same thing.  We may see something someone else worries about and think it's silly.  However, when we worry about something, we without hesitation defend the legitimacy of that worry.  We can most certainly rationalize it, and we think others are crazy to not worry about that same thing.

I worry about things, even though I like to say I don't.  I sort of believe that we should tithe 10% of our gross income to the local church; I worry because every month if my family does that we won't have enough money to pay the bills and eat food.  I really want to do something special with my life; I worry that I'm going to go through life being comfortable and too safe with my choices and miss what I'm supposed to do. I really want to lead my family and make good decisions for us; I worry that I won't be the husband and father I'm supposed to be or maybe make a decision that ruins the future of our children (boy #3 is due in May, by the way).

I really could go on.  My worries might seem silly to you.  But you know you've got your own.

I guess it's a process.  As a Christian, I'm quite sure that God knows we won't have the faith to elude worry in every situation.  I think that's why He reminds us so frequently in His Word.  But circumstances don't change who He is.

I grew up playing basketball, and, like Michael Jordan, I always wanted to be taller.  (He wanted to be 7 feet tall. VIDEO)  I never figured how to stretch my frame, but I do know one thing that won't help me to grow taller...

Matthew 6:26-28

New King James Version (NKJV)

26 Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 
27 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?
28 “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin;

I'm really thirsty

I really like a challenge. I am very competitive (although maybe not quite as competitive as my wife), and I don't like to lose. I like a challenge when playing sports or playing a game. If I am playing basketball and teams are being selected, be sure to put me on the team that is the underdog. I find little satisfaction in being part of the team that "should" win. I want the challenge of being part of the team that has to give all it has to even compete. That is fun to me. For games and stuff like that, it's a blast.

But then there's real life. In real life, I have no interest in being challenged for the most part. Sure, there are times where I have to solve a problem or figure out how to get something to work. Those opportunities are exciting. If I can make it like an algebraic expression and solve for X, I'm gonna be all over that.

The things I don't like are circumstances that I can't control. That's not easy. For example: A relative is ill. Stuff at work is not going how we want it to. People are talking bad about us for no reason. That stuff is for the birds. Why would I want that for myself or anyone? That's all bad stuff. I want my real life to be easy and fun and enjoyable. But guess what...that's not always real life.

Real life is tough. The Bible even tells us that if we are Christians things won't be a breeze. In fact, it says life will be downright difficult at times. I've thought about this a lot the last year or two. I have heard this song (at the top) a number of times and feel like I can relate to it. I love one of the lines toward the end: "What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life, is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy."

Stop and think for a moment. What if...

For some reason as I am typing this I have so many thoughts going through my head I feel like I could write a book just on this topic. But I know there are a couple points I want to put out there to ponder.

Ultimately, we need to get to a place in our lives where we have a "thirst this world can't satisfy." If we are feeling good about life and loving every second and just going about our merry way, will we ever get to that place? It's a serious thing to consider.

One other thing that is on my mind is the question of what is good for us and what is bad for us. In light of my previous question, I tend to think that our definition of what is bad for us may differ from God's definition of what is bad for us. Don't misunderstand me here. One thing I believe that the Bible teaches is that God will at times discipline (for lack of a better word) us if we stray from the path He has for us. I believe that is what a loving Father would do to bring His children back to the right place. (In my view this is different than punishment as the Bible also teaches us that there is no more condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.) But separately, I think sometimes things happen in our lives that may even be caused by God that we would consider to be bad for us, mainly because they are trying and tough to handle. But here is the question...if something happens in our lives that causes us to turn to Him and seek His face more than before, could we possibly as Christians define that as a bad thing? I know it's difficult because we can't see the whole picture, but we need to remember that, no matter the circumstances, being close to Jesus and glorifying Him is our purpose here.

That concludes the post, really, but I just want to add a footnote of sorts. Remember that I am just typing my thoughts on life. I may be wrong on things, but I may be right. I am just going through life reflecting and trying to figure this stuff out, just like everyone else. Feel free to comment a question or observation even if you disagree with something I said. You won't hurt my feelings. I appreciate dialogue.

Praise Him in the storm?

Have you ever been through a tough time and wondered where God is?

I think it happens to all of us where we go through times in life that it seems nothing can go your way. One thing after another happens as if there is someone out there controlling the universe in such a way as to cause every single event to work against us.  At those moments is when we are to cry out to God and ask Him for comfort and to make our situation right.

That's what we're told, anyway.

Now you would say, "Wait!  Aren't we supposed to call out to God in time of need?"  Absolutely!  You know the Bible says that God's strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).  That leads us to believe that at our weakest moments God is always there and we should look to Him when our weakest moments come.

But what about the other times?  What about the times that are seemingly wonderful?  What about the times we feel like we are walking on the clouds?  I would submit to you that the most important time to seek God and His presence and peace is during the times that things are going well.  When all in the world is right and you are smiling and singing a happy tune, do you seek Him like He is the most important thing in your life?

To expand on the analogy of walking on the clouds in the good times, surely if we are walking on the clouds we are bound to fall off at some point, right? My belief is that if we will seek Him during the good times, His presence will be so much more evident in the tough times. What's more, if we seek Him during the times when life is easy, we will learn how to see Him and recognize Him in every situation. That practice in the good times will prepare us to see Him when circumstances seem so overwhelming.

Fix your eyes on Him now, even when it may feel like you don't need Him to survive. Then, when circumstances make it abundantly clear that He truly is your only hope, you will feel His calming presence as if He is with you always.