The text my wife sent me

My wife sent me this wonderful text message the other day. There was no specific event that took place to prompt it. Or if there was some event it was unbeknownst to me. Whatever the case she sent me this text, and it meant a lot. It didn't take much time for her to compose and send it, but I doubt I am the only husband who appreciates receiving encouragement from his wife. The message from her was sincere and heartfelt and made me smile.

Before I move onto the next part of the story let me suggest to you wives out there that husbands really appreciate your kind and respectful words. Husbands sometimes feel like all their wives do is put them down. Of course I have never felt like that (okay that's a lie). The truth is that we usually deserve it, but consistent kind and respectful words can help a husband learn how to treat his wife.

Okay back to the story (yes unfortunately there is more). After feeling so good about the text my wife sent me, I proceeded to come home after work and demean her right in front of a member of her extended family. It was about something that wasn't even a big deal, but the words I said and the tone with which I said it made her, as she put it, "feel dumb." So after the text she sent me that you read at the top of this post, I came home and made her feel dumb, in front of another adult. Anthony, FTW. Much sarcasm intended.

(By the way, FTW stands for For The Win, as if I was about to hit a game winning shot on the basketball court for example. I wondered for the longest time what that meant, then I googled it. You can find any answer you want on google. Sometimes the answer is even correct.)

So here's the point...

Guys, don't be idiots. We are supposed to love our wives as Christ loves the church. Don't talk down to her or treat her like she's stupid, especially in front of other people.

And ladies, even though you make great effort to encourage your husband and make him feel respected, he is going to do the same thing I did. He's a guy. Give him some grace and say more nice things about him. Eventually he will improve.

The last point is for the dudes. Check out this quote from a book I read a while back and really think about what it means (I'm not going to publish the name of the book here for fear I might lose my man-card, that is if I still have it):

"Some (men) may even go to their graves and never understand that to truly cherish a woman they must die to every scrap of self-interest."

If I had a nickle for every time...

"I'm too old to go back to school."  If I had a nickle for every time I have heard that in the past 10 years or so...

You see, for almost 10 years I have been working in admissions at Piedmont College, a small private college in Northeast Georgia, almost nine years in graduate admissions and now almost a year in undergraduate admissions.  In my current role I am in charge of recruiting and the admissions process for "adult learners" at the undergraduate level, which for Piedmont means age 25 and older.

Many I talk to are in one of two categories.  The first is those who haven't even considered the possibility of returning to school.  The other group is those who are beginning the process of gathering information, or perhaps have even made application, but they are very nervous and apprehensive about the whole thing.

I would like to give you just a few bits of insight that may help calm your fears as it relates to returning to school.  This is certainly not a comprehensive list of reasons to attend but will give you some food for thought.

1) You aren't the only one.

I can sense in so many of my prospective students that inside they are feeling like they are the only person on the planet that would possibly consider going to school at their age.  When that becomes evident I will just come out and say to them, "You're not the only one!"  There are a significant number of students enrolled all over the US who are working professionals, or perhaps have recently become unemployed after a 20 year career in manufacturing.  In fact, the average age at Athens Technical College is 26 years old.  That means the average student is an "adult learner."  Did you know that only 15% of currently enrolled college students are "traditional," meaning attend a four year school out of high school and live on campus?  Guess who the other 85% are...

2) It's more affordable than you think.

It is undeniably true that tuition prices across the country have increased significantly and continue to do so.  However, many colleges so value the life experience the adult learner brings to the classroom that they are willing to provide deep discounts.  As an example, Piedmont College offers the Neighborhood Grant Program, which provides a 50% tuition discount for those students who live in the Northeast Georgia area.  If you attend a technical school in Georgia often times the Hope Grant covers most or all of the tuition cost.  Add to that the Pell Grant and other types of funding and the financial aspect of completing a bachelor's degree is often a non-issue.

3) Folks are living longer these days.

So you're going to retire at 62 or even 65, you say?  Maybe you will be in a financial position where you can do that, and that would be wonderful!  But get this...in 1960 the average life expectancy in the US was 69.77.  The average life expectancy as of 2010?  78.24!  Because of the great advancement of medicine and medical training, we are living almost 10 years longer on average than we were 50 years ago.  For that person who is 60 years old and needs maybe two more years to complete a degree, they may still have 18-20 years left of living.  What a great opportunity to make an impact on your community late in life with the knowledge and training you receive from a college degree.

In summary, maybe you or someone you know has thought about the possibility of returning to school but discounted the thought because you felt like you were too old.  Whether it would be a bachelor's or master's degree, I hope what you have read makes you think a little more seriously about what the possibilities could be.



Note: Please ask if you are interested in sources.

Praise Him in the storm?

Have you ever been through a tough time and wondered where God is?

I think it happens to all of us where we go through times in life that it seems nothing can go your way. One thing after another happens as if there is someone out there controlling the universe in such a way as to cause every single event to work against us.  At those moments is when we are to cry out to God and ask Him for comfort and to make our situation right.

That's what we're told, anyway.

Now you would say, "Wait!  Aren't we supposed to call out to God in time of need?"  Absolutely!  You know the Bible says that God's strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).  That leads us to believe that at our weakest moments God is always there and we should look to Him when our weakest moments come.

But what about the other times?  What about the times that are seemingly wonderful?  What about the times we feel like we are walking on the clouds?  I would submit to you that the most important time to seek God and His presence and peace is during the times that things are going well.  When all in the world is right and you are smiling and singing a happy tune, do you seek Him like He is the most important thing in your life?

To expand on the analogy of walking on the clouds in the good times, surely if we are walking on the clouds we are bound to fall off at some point, right? My belief is that if we will seek Him during the good times, His presence will be so much more evident in the tough times. What's more, if we seek Him during the times when life is easy, we will learn how to see Him and recognize Him in every situation. That practice in the good times will prepare us to see Him when circumstances seem so overwhelming.

Fix your eyes on Him now, even when it may feel like you don't need Him to survive. Then, when circumstances make it abundantly clear that He truly is your only hope, you will feel His calming presence as if He is with you always.

Time Flies When You are Having Fun!

Oh my goodness!  I looked back to see what I had written over the past year...it was a big fat nothing.  Seriously, the year started off with dreams and goals, I know it did.  I then grabbed the year by the horns and apparently I just let go...on December 31st.  I haven't blogged about anything--not even the fact that TJ lost his first tooth or our trip to Disney World. 

Well, I have genuinely missed writing down all my random thoughts.  I missed making people angry with my opinions and causing people to stop and think.  So, on that note, I am officially back.  I think it's good for the soul to sit and blog.

And to kick it all off, I wanted you to know--I made NO resolutions this year.  Not a one.  I have done that the last few years and I just find that I get frustrated, overwhelmed, and went on without them any how.  Now I am just trying to be better than I was yesterday.  It's definitely more of a challenge to me.  I have good days and bad days. 

So please, take this as my welcome back into my world.  I won't  be blogging every day...but I hope to be doing it at least once a week.  Maybe I can make you laugh again....or at least make you feel normal! 

Wanted: Mission Field Near Me

I get so frustrated sometimes. I'll be listening to some great, "Go out and tell others" message or watch a story about some amazing missionaries and I will just get completely down and out. My mind goes to the thought--"Lord, I don't have a mission field! I spend the majority of time in my home raising children and working. When I do get out, it is for church events or with friends and family. Where's my mission field?"

Recently, I was feeling very sorry for myself. I kept thinking it wasn't fair. In my mind there was no way for me to fulfill the "go" commission of the Bible. It took a minute and I finally just gave it up to God. Without thinking, in my mind, I gave over this desire to the Lord and just moved on with my day.

The following day, I checked my Instagram (For those of you who don't know, this is my newest obsession. It's a photography app for the iPhone that allows you to create a social profile and share your photos with people from all over the world. It's one of the most popular apps today and people share all kinds of things--good and bad. However, it has given me an outlet to share my everyday life, have adult interactions, and look at beautiful photographs from all over the world. If you have the app, please come find me--jt1114_ih.) as I do every day. I was checking through my notifications and came across something very interesting. I had posted a picture with a comment that questioned what were we reflecting? As Christians, we should reflect our Creator. Often times though, the best we are is a muddy reflection. The picture was of a red Georgia clay puddle that was reflecting two beautiful bare winter trees. As I read lower, I noticed that an individual had posted something to me and had gone into a personal story and had mentioned that she was an unbeliever. I responded and offered some words of encouragement and a hope that one day she would find the peace and joy that I had found. She responded in a positive way and I feel like I was able to help in some small way. Even more, I feel like I might have been able to plant a seed.

At that moment, I felt like Sarah. Remember when Sarah laughed at God when He told her she would have a baby at an old age? She didn't believe that it was possible for her to be used. She even scoffed at the idea of it ever happening. In some small way, I know some of what she was feeling holding her newborn son and being awfully ashamed for not trusting. I didn't laugh at God, but I was pretty skeptical that I would ever have the opportunity to talk to someone like I did in the instance above. And boy, talk about quick work. The Lord made me look foolish quick!

The truth is we all have mission fields right where we are. I know many of you work with unbelievers. Some of you go to school with unbelievers every day. The question is. . . are we willing to make the effort? I had never thought of Instagram as a way to reach others. I had used it for my own devices--promoting my photography, socializing, etc. God has other reasons for my participation in the IG world. I didn't see that until my silent prayer and this random user's comment opened my eyes.

I bet some of you are thinking, that event is a total coincidence. There are some of you who are probably thinking that I am making a big deal out of something so small and insignificant. Well you are wrong on both accounts. First, it wasn't a total coincidence. The Lord had tried to show me this before when someone asked me a question about my profile description that says God fearing. I answered the question, but never followed up on that person and never thought beyond what the user had asked me. This time, I believe that God knew I needed a bold, in-your-face moment where the person was so open that I couldn't miss it. Second, the world of IG is no small matter. I literally have over 1,000 followers just on my profile alone. This doesn't account for the thousands and thousands more that are out there in IG world with the same hurts, thoughts, and ideas as the IG user who spoke to me not long ago. I have the opportunity to reach thousands of people through my pictures and my stories. I feel like it is a huge responsibility and blessing. Also, isn't every soul significant? People often make fun of how "into" Instagram I am lately. Well, now I have good reason to be!

I hope that this encourages you to go out and find a mission field of your own. You don't have to go to Africa or Asia to reach people with the Good News. There are people who live on your street who are hurting and looking for someone to lend an ear. There are children who would love to go to church, but don't have a ride. If you watch the news you can see millions of hurting people within the United States who are looking for someone to care. Many are not the easiest people to reach. Some people have to be loved on in order for their hearts to be softened. It's worth the time and effort. If this post encourages you in some way, I hope you will let me know! If you find a new mission field, I would love to hear about it.

Ready to take on the world again....

What is it about the start of a new year that always gets you pumped to start things off fresh? I woke up today with a different perspective without even really thinking about it. There's something about this year that feels different. I don't know what it is or what that means, but today, I feel ready to take on the world--that's a good feeling!

Every year on this day I do look back and try to reflect on what I said I was going to do the year before. Did it work out? How did my year go? What were the big mistakes and the big victories? It's just who I am.

Well, I am going to revisit last year's NOT TO DO list I made and see how I did! You can check it out to by going clicking HERE. Did I continue running and increase over 3 miles? Yes to the increase, but not to the continuing. Photography threw me for a loop when I got incredibly busy in the fall. It was a blessing, but I will tell you, not running has made a huge impact on my health. I start back tomorrow-NO MATTER WHAT. This year's first Not To Do is--Don't give up on running. I got up to close to 4 miles and I am happy as I am not a long distance runner.

Number two was to be a better mom. I think I did the best I could. I still have so much room for improvement. I think that each year, the child/parent relationship changes. Each age brings a different challenge and joy. I have learned to accept that and am trying to roll with the punches. The challenge this year--Don't let mothering mistakes get me down. Everyone makes them and the key is to learn from them.

Number three was a total loss. In fact, there was one moment where I was completely overwhelmed in the fall. I didn't keep things in perspective and was just going nuts. This year I have changed it--Don't let anything overlap my God time and my family time. It should always come first.

Number four wasn't a total loss. I think I did a few more things that this year that I wouldn't have done last year, but I still have so far to go in this department. This year it goes a little something like this--Don't worry about being the perfect Christian. Be the best you can be and let God do the rest.

I think I did much better with number five. I cherished every mountain top that came my way. The issue I found was that I cherished it so much that I had an almost even worse drop when they were over. The lows got LOW. (I said that in a deep voice in my mind while I was typing.) This year it's a different angle--Don't take lows for granted. There is always something to be learned and my lows are not as bad as I usually believe them to be.

Number six is the one I struggled with the most. I live with anxiety every day. It's a fact of life that I have lived with for years. When I decided I was going to really try to change that it seemed that the battles got worse. (Who would have thought?) Amazingly enough, the last week of 2011 was the worst fight with it. It was this period that brought me to this one for the list--Don't let fear win the fight. Keep fighting. I always like to think I am a fighter, but fear makes me a wimp. I am sick of being a wimp.

I worked as hard as anyone in 2011 on number seven. I have tried to make time for everyone in the family. I have tried to pray for them and just enjoy everything about them. Even though this sounds great, I learned something. Even your family can hurt you. Please don't misunderstand. My family has never beaten me, verbally abused me (for the most part haha), etc. Yet, words are a powerful tool. The closer you get to people the more open you become to hurts. So I came away with this--Don't think your family is perfect. They are flawed just like you. Love them no matter what and realize that they love you--even when things get bumpy.

Number eight is almost a joke for a person like me. I live a chaotic existence so expecting me to become a neat freak in a year was unrealistic. But, I am happy to say that I started 2012 with a somewhat clean house. Small victory that lead to this--Don't have unrealistic expectations. Do your best with it, but don't let it drown or trap you. ASK FOR HELP!

Number nine I have actually done somewhat better on in the last few months. I have seen friends that I haven't been able to see in some time. I am also hoping to get involved with the young couples at our church more. We made a step in that direction as a couple this month and it really meant a lot to me. So for this one--Don't stop reaching out. I want to show myself a good friend to gain more friends (and to lead others to Christ).

I wish that I could say that number ten was the greatest success. I feel like I such a failure in this area because I never feel like I can keep it up. I have spurts where I do great and then I fall on my face. So here it is--Don't give up. No matter what keep striving--I am not perfect, but I'll keep running the race to win the prize.

Please come and keep me accountable! Whether it be by Facebook or by leaving a message here. Each comment you leave encourages me or makes me think. Pray for me! This is a journey and I want to do my best. . .but I am pretty clumsy and fall quite a bit. I hope that you will stick with me this year and thanks to those who encouraged me to jump back into blogging. I let myself get caught up in activities and I missed this intellectual outlet I created!

God bless you and yours in 2012!

Busy, Busy, Busy......Taking time to breathe....

I know you devoted followers out there have been wondering why in the world I have not been posting lately! Well, that's a good question. I have a good answer--I have been busy! As if being a mother of two fiesty little boys wasn't enough, I have added teacher, photographer, part-time worker, maid, and much more back on to the list recently. Don't get me wrong! I am not complaining in the least. I am just explaining my absence.

I decided in the quiet moments of this late evening to take the time to encourage all you people out in the virtual world to take some time to breathe. I have not done that in the last few weeks. I have rushed, rushed, rushed through every activity, phone call, work activity, Bible study, etc. To make it worse, I feel like I even rushed through our annual camping trip last weekend! I am going to do my best to chill out the next few days and focus on the must do's (feeding my kids, our animals, and dealing with the necessities of life) and do a few of the I want to do's. I am going to blog some, read some, run some and more. I don't care what it takes....I am not going to rush the next few days. I encourage you to do the same!

Before you know it...you'll be rushing to your grave....and Lord knows I don't want to do that!