Jen and I are very much opposed to him having a phone where he can access the web, YouTube, etc., when we're not around. However, we have recently gotten a little more concerned about him being away from us with no direct method of communication. One day on the way to school last week, with his best friend Tanner in tow, I told TJ his mom and I were going to get him a flip phone. It is perfect for what we need, and he needs. I told him all he needs to be able to do is call and text.
When I was dropping them off, Tanner walked toward the front door. TJ started that way, then came back as if only to shut the door. Then he leaned in and said to me, "Did you have to bring up a flip phone in front of Tanner?" I chuckled and told him I'd love to have a flip phone.
Nevertheless, I do not own a flip phone, and they aren't like $10 as they seemed to be not long ago, and we're not really interested in embarrassing our kids just for the heck of it.
So, I dug out an old phone from a few years ago. It's perfect. It's a Windows phone. Did you know they still make those? It has no front-facing camera, no flash on the back, and it barely works to do anything except call and text. There are very few apps available, and the ones that are there mostly don't work very well. But the battery lasts forever.
I looked into the cheapest plans I could find, and the option I settled on was a pay-as-you-go plan from Tracfone. I ordered a SIM card from Walmart.com for $0.99, and then I purchased a 30 day plan with limited data, call minutes, and text for $15. I got it all set up, but apparently there is a trick to getting the data to work because I haven't figured it out yet. That's just fine with me!
We talked with TJ last night and told him that we had a phone, that is not his, that is the families, that is mine and his mom's. We were going to allow him to use for only the purpose of communicating with his parents and other family members, and perhaps Mrs. Nicole. We explained there are limited minutes and texts, and that he wasn't to use the data at all. No YouTube on the phone. No games. No nothing. It was not to be used for his enjoyment.
We explained he would pick it up from beside our bed in the morning and return it when he gets home from school. They can't have phones during the school day at TFS, so he has to turn it in at the front desk anyway.
I told him it is under my Microsoft account, so I can see everything that he has done. Then we told him if he proves to be trustworthy with it, and takes care of it, and doesn't misuse it, perhaps we would consider allowing him to download a game or two.
He agreed to do as we said. We let him customize it a bit with background images, etc. He changed the beautiful photo of his mom on her contact info to a photo of Mario. Etc. Etc. He took it to school with him today and never even turned it on.
We did not want to come to this day so soon. Cell phones are so private, so mobile, so available everywhere, they can be very dangerous. As you all know. Kids can get into all kinds of trouble with cell phones, as has been well documented. Pre-teen and teenage girls have their set own challenges, issues, and temptations with cell phones. But boys, in my view, have it much worse. There are so many temptations that are available right at their fingertips. Despite what we have taught and trained, mistakes can be made. Having said that, our goal is to limit the exposure as much as possible for the time being as we continue to train and develop these young minds and hearts and eyes to be pure and honor God in all that they do.
We are teaching young boys how to one day be godly men. This is something we do not take lightly.
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