We are living in a Pinterest World. I admit it. I get caught up in creating a million boards that I will never go back and look at. There I am, spending too much time pinning dresses I will never wear, hair styles I would never be brave enough to try, rooms in houses I would never be able to afford, & places I will never be able to talk my husband into visiting. Give me just about 5 minutes on Pinterest and I feel like an ugly, under performing, terribly dressed mom who should be grateful for every blissful moment.
So today, I found it pretty interesting when one of my favorite moms at Jase's school made the comment, "Pinterest is the devil." Ahhhhhh.......Camden. My thoughts exactly! While I love having a world of ideas, recipes, crafts, and birthday party themes at my finger tips, the downside seems pretty, well a downer. Is Pinterest really the devil?
Think about it. Camden mentioned that it only bred frustration in her when she saw all the crazy amazing house designs and couldn't afford to replicate them in the home they were building. I'm right there with you girl. Facebook can have the same affect when we see our friends with these amazing spaces. I wouldn't call our space amazing. It's more like lived in chic.
But it's bigger than that. I have had clients warn me that their children are not "Pinterest kids." Well of course they aren't! Many of the kids you see on Pinterest are the children of photographers. Either they have had a camera in their face since their first breath, or their parents have learned the fantastical magic we in the photography world call face swap. Trying to get your kid to look as serene and composed as the kids in those examples found on Pinterest will cause you to have a panic attack at your session! Plus, it places unrealistic expectations on your normal kid. Yes. Your kid is normal. Embrace the normal.
It grows even worse with bad advice flowing like the Nile River. "Ten Ways to be a Better Wife" or "Have a New Child by Friday" may sound enticing, but once you read it, you realize you could have just been a better wife by talking to your husband for the 15 minutes it took you to read an article that told you that being a better wife means letting your husband drive all the time so he is in control. Just flip through some pins. Apparently, every single person in the world knows how to lose weight, be a effective mom, plan vacations, and cook better than I can. According to Pinterest, I am an idiot.
But we don't have to live a Pinterest perfect life. In fact, we can't. It's impossible. We are sinners saved by the grace of an Almighty God. I am not always the best mom. I can't be. My patience will run too thin one day and I am probably going to yell. Maybe even call someone a ding dong. Forget me being the perfect wife. I have read 100 times about how to love my husband who needs words of affirmation, but I will still use my words to lash out at him from time to time. And my house......just forget it.
Of course we can't throw the baby out with the bath water. Pinterest offers a lot of great suggestions. But that's the point--they are suggestions. Not every pin is for everybody. And if you feel like it makes you frustrated or discontented, don't be afraid to delete it. I have found that once I stopped looking at things that offered me advice or things I couldn't possibly ever have, it also weeded it out of my suggested feeds. That means I only saw pins related to those that I showed the most interest in. Once I figured that out, my Pinterest World became a bit smaller, but much more pleasant.
To be honest, I am okay with my imperfection. It means I am human. I'm also okay with not having a perfect house. It means I have three healthy, messy kids who love living here. I'm even okay with my crazy hair. It might not be easy to handle all the time and get in the way.......okay. Who am I kidding? I desperately need a hair cut. If you happen across some great cuts, send them my way.
Wednesday, January 30, 2019
Wednesday, January 16, 2019
Lessons for 2019 From Moana
It's a new year and we all are looking forward to a new journey and memories to be made in 2019. Recently, though, I have been doing some soul searching. Who am I? Where am I headed? What is God calling me to do? Is He even calling me at all? A lot of people would say it's all stemming from me creeping (and I mean army crawling) toward middle age. Once we hit a midpoint, it's time to take stock and remember where we have been and determine where we are going.
It's funny. Disney is something that has stood out to me since I was a kid. I have always loved the movies, the songs, and the fairy tales that they put out on the big screen. Yeah, they don't always stand for the best things and it's crazy stupid expensive, but it's something I grew up with and enjoyed.
One song recently has stood out to me. It comes from a movie that, to me, wasn't their best, but was entertaining none the less. Maybe you have heard it a thousand times? I know I have. It's "I am Moana (Song of the Ancestors)" from the movie "Moana." If you are one of the three people in the world who hasn't heard the song, her part goes a little like this--
It's all about a girl who listens to her grandmother and then describes who she is in a really catchy song. When I first saw the movie and heard the song the first thousand times, I didn't really think much about it. But as I sat reflecting, it came back to me.
So I came to the question that Moana came to during her journey. Who am I? Well, Moana, that is a stinking good question! If you would have asked me 15 years ago, I would have said I am a teacher and coach.....a wife and a friend. I love basketball and it brings me so much happiness and excitement. I am the daughter of a coach and a teacher, and descended from preachers. Those who have preached the Word without fear. They remind me.
Yes, a lot of my song remains the same. But so much has changed. I am no longer the teacher and coach to kids who became like my own children. I am definitely not the same wife that I was so long ago. I am still a daughter and a friend who descended from preachers, but I am also not the same.
As many of you know, this year, Anthony and I will be celebrating our 16th wedding anniversary. It doesn't seem like that much time has come and gone. We were just babes when we got married. Although to some, we were more mature and true adults when we finally (we had a pretty long engagement) made it to the altar. But to me, we were just kids (I was 22 and he was 21). I'll leave the longer story for another time, but we didn't have a clue as to what we were getting ourselves into at the time. I am ever so grateful that things have changed and I have become a better wife with a better relationship with her husband.
Sports were a huge part of my life. I had just finished up a 4-year stint as a guard at Piedmont College. While I was happy to be done (my poor old body didn't have much left in it), I needed a new outlet for that kind of energy and passion. I found that in coaching. My kids would tell you I was pretty intense, but I really wanted them to be successful and learn that with a little hard work, you could beat anyone and accomplish goals. It was hard to walk away from teaching, but coaching was probably even harder. All the energy instead got bottled up and it drove me crazy for a while.
But those were just parts of who I was. I remember thinking those things would be me forever. But here I sit, far removed from the teacher and coach who I once was. While my song seems to constantly be changing, who I am remains the same. I am still passionate and stubborn. I get defensive, but I am my own worst critic. I am still a teacher, just not in the same way. I am still a coach, just generally not on the sidelines.
The best part of my song? The Writer and Creator of it knows my past and future. I can take stock of who I am, but I don't have to worry about where I am going. My songwriter knows where my path leads. He knows each turn and lyric of my song by heart. He reminds me every day that this song will just get sweeter--even with all the changes, even with all the high and low notes. And one day, when my song ends, I will meet the one who wrote the beautiful melody that was my life. And I hope that He will think that I lived it well.
But as far as 2019 goes, I am ready. Whatever this last year of my 30's may hold, I face it with eagerness and excitement. I go into it holding the hand of the One who always reminds me and calls me through it all.
It's funny. Disney is something that has stood out to me since I was a kid. I have always loved the movies, the songs, and the fairy tales that they put out on the big screen. Yeah, they don't always stand for the best things and it's crazy stupid expensive, but it's something I grew up with and enjoyed.
One song recently has stood out to me. It comes from a movie that, to me, wasn't their best, but was entertaining none the less. Maybe you have heard it a thousand times? I know I have. It's "I am Moana (Song of the Ancestors)" from the movie "Moana." If you are one of the three people in the world who hasn't heard the song, her part goes a little like this--
(Moana): Who am I?
I am the girl who loves my island
I'm the girl who loves the sea
It calls me
I am the daughter of the village chief
We are descended from voyagers
Who found their way across the world
They call me
I've delivered us to where we are
I have journeyed farther
I am everything I've learned and more
Still it calls me
And the call isn't out there at all
It's inside me
It's like the tide, always falling and rising
I will carry you here in my heart
You remind me
That come what may, I know the way
I am Moana!
I am the girl who loves my island
I'm the girl who loves the sea
It calls me
I am the daughter of the village chief
We are descended from voyagers
Who found their way across the world
They call me
I've delivered us to where we are
I have journeyed farther
I am everything I've learned and more
Still it calls me
And the call isn't out there at all
It's inside me
It's like the tide, always falling and rising
I will carry you here in my heart
You remind me
That come what may, I know the way
I am Moana!
It's all about a girl who listens to her grandmother and then describes who she is in a really catchy song. When I first saw the movie and heard the song the first thousand times, I didn't really think much about it. But as I sat reflecting, it came back to me.
So I came to the question that Moana came to during her journey. Who am I? Well, Moana, that is a stinking good question! If you would have asked me 15 years ago, I would have said I am a teacher and coach.....a wife and a friend. I love basketball and it brings me so much happiness and excitement. I am the daughter of a coach and a teacher, and descended from preachers. Those who have preached the Word without fear. They remind me.
Yes, a lot of my song remains the same. But so much has changed. I am no longer the teacher and coach to kids who became like my own children. I am definitely not the same wife that I was so long ago. I am still a daughter and a friend who descended from preachers, but I am also not the same.
As many of you know, this year, Anthony and I will be celebrating our 16th wedding anniversary. It doesn't seem like that much time has come and gone. We were just babes when we got married. Although to some, we were more mature and true adults when we finally (we had a pretty long engagement) made it to the altar. But to me, we were just kids (I was 22 and he was 21). I'll leave the longer story for another time, but we didn't have a clue as to what we were getting ourselves into at the time. I am ever so grateful that things have changed and I have become a better wife with a better relationship with her husband.
Sports were a huge part of my life. I had just finished up a 4-year stint as a guard at Piedmont College. While I was happy to be done (my poor old body didn't have much left in it), I needed a new outlet for that kind of energy and passion. I found that in coaching. My kids would tell you I was pretty intense, but I really wanted them to be successful and learn that with a little hard work, you could beat anyone and accomplish goals. It was hard to walk away from teaching, but coaching was probably even harder. All the energy instead got bottled up and it drove me crazy for a while.
But those were just parts of who I was. I remember thinking those things would be me forever. But here I sit, far removed from the teacher and coach who I once was. While my song seems to constantly be changing, who I am remains the same. I am still passionate and stubborn. I get defensive, but I am my own worst critic. I am still a teacher, just not in the same way. I am still a coach, just generally not on the sidelines.
The best part of my song? The Writer and Creator of it knows my past and future. I can take stock of who I am, but I don't have to worry about where I am going. My songwriter knows where my path leads. He knows each turn and lyric of my song by heart. He reminds me every day that this song will just get sweeter--even with all the changes, even with all the high and low notes. And one day, when my song ends, I will meet the one who wrote the beautiful melody that was my life. And I hope that He will think that I lived it well.
But as far as 2019 goes, I am ready. Whatever this last year of my 30's may hold, I face it with eagerness and excitement. I go into it holding the hand of the One who always reminds me and calls me through it all.
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